As I grew up, I was very open-minded when it came to matters involving sexuality. I was also very conscious of my spirituality and the sense that someone or something bigger than I was involved in my life. The two most intimate aspects of my identity, however, operated totally separate from each other…or so I thought.
The way I functioned was to turn off my God mode when I wanted to be sexual. In turn, I switched off my sexual mode when I wanted to be spiritual. This was a brilliant solution, right? Not really.
What if instead, we understood and experienced ourselves as connected to everyone and everything in our Universe?
You may be wondering, “What about love?” Love is actually the foundation for bringing the spiritual into the sexual. It is the glue that holds these vast and visceral experiences together. Without love we do not have access to the spiritual realm, for love is not only the path to experiencing the Divine. Love is also the path itself. Love really is what the world needs right now. So how do you begin ?
Here are the 3 first steps toward marrying your sexuality with your spirituality:
1. Realize that this is a matter of the heart, not the head.
Most people find this very difficult, but practice sitting in meditation for at least 10 minutes. This is vital to keeping you connected to your heart. Set the timer, drop into inner self and take deliberate breaths. You can also just be still and listen to your heart beating.
2. Monitor your judgments.
Your mind judges all day and all night long! It’s what the mind does. Begin to acknowledge your thoughts and tag them with this mantra, “I don’t know what it is, but I love it.” I for one can testify that this mantra works and I know others who can say the same. One part of coming back to yourself and love involves letting go of judgments. This practice alone can change the course of your life.
3. Set an intention before being sexual with yourself or your partner.
How can you prepare for a spiritual sexual connection with yourself or your lover? Having sex of any kind is one of the most intimate experiences that you can create. Simply close your eyes, breathe, allowing a prayer or blessing to come forth. You can state your prayer out loud or within yourself. In this way, you invite the transformational energy of spiritual love-making to support your spiritual petition which is rooted in love.
In the end, you’ve joined sex and spirit through unity by coming back to love which is the foundation of all things Tantra.